Ashadam Blues or Greys


For those of you who are wondering what Ashadam or Ashadamasam means,( I think the present MTV generation might be ignorant about this) it is the fourth month of the Hindu calendar just before the auspicious Sravan and generally comes around the month of July. This time, however, it starts in the month of June from the 21st onwards. Generally in this month brides and grooms are not supposed to see their in-laws according to our traditions. So, newly married brides end up staying alone with their parents as she is forced to leave hubby dear and her in-laws.

Ashadam Blues Or Greys

Hey! All you new brides of Vizag, for the past few weeks, life has been in 'fastforward' mode - shopping for the d-day, the wedding and other ceremonies, planning for the honeymoon, socialising and all of a sudden the month of Ashadam stretches ahead in front of you! And you are wondering "what do I do? How will I pass time? I am missing him soooo much".

Come on! Cheer up! this separation has its own advantages : it gives you time to prepare for the role you have to play ahead. And although the sky is overcast, with grey monsoon clouds, your mood need not be grey. Another hidden advantage is that love grows from yearning for each other.

Here's how not to miss him :

You need not send a 'Meghasandesam' to your beloved, there are lots of other means that you know very well : e-mail, phone, cards. Use any medium, but convey your feelings, tell him that you love him and miss him, miss those moments of togetherness. If you are sending an email across, attach your scanned honeymoon snaps or video clippings of your wedding. It is really fun, selecting the 'I miss you' cards and adding your own personal touch. You can also tape some sweet endearments with love songs in between and courier it across. All the feelings that you felt shy to express orally can be easily expressed when you pen them down. And you will know for a fact, that you will be a lot closer to each other at an emotional level when you meet him after all this.

Here's how to make the most of your time :

  • You had been to umpteen dinners and lunches after your wedding and all that rich food and sweets might have distorted your beautiful figure. So try and get back to shape, play games, do yoga, aerobics or take a walk on the beach road. Or else, join a gym. But don't miss a nice opportunity to get back to shape, else the didi will look like an aunty in a month or two. (For more info, click here).

  • You will not get this time to spend with your near and dear ones for a long time, all future visits might be short ones, so make the most of it. Spend time with your close friends and relatives for you do not know when you will get this opportunity to spend time alone with them again. And meanwhile, take a few tips from them on homemaking and how to play the role of a daughter-in-law a la Tulasi in Kyonki saas bhi... or Kalisundamra, the Telugu version.

  • If all these years Mummy dearest has been pampering you, then it is time you brush up your culinary skills. Try and note down the best recipes from your mom, aunts, friends etc. Or join a cookery class. Do not forget to learn your husband's favourites as the famous saying goes "The way to a man's heart is through his stomach".

  • You can take up a few craft courses like painting, flower decoration or soft-toy making. After all, you have to decorate your dream house.

  • This season has the best offers : almost all showrooms in the city have clearance sales. So make the most of the bargains offered and shop for your home and yourself as you will have no time on your hands when Ashadam is over and you are back with him. Some shops like Chandana, Bomanna, KanakaMahalakshmi, JK.Silks offer heavy discounts during this season.

  • Even the price of the gold comes down during this season - a nice opportunity to convert all your gift cheques and cash (if any is left after honeymoon shopping) into some nice simple sets for casual wear.

With all these things and much more you might complain that there is not enough time. So smile and be happy. Happy Ashadam to you all and happy waiting!

- Vennela

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